A letter from Kristin
Dear Friends & Fellow Riders,
I want to share some thoughts with you that go deeper than my bio. If you’re reading this, you’re probably considering riding with me & I’d like to tell you more about how I work and why so that you have more information to decide if we would be a good fit. I’ve been teaching in this industry for a long time and I’ve been a for rider even longer, so I can tell you, from many years of professional and personal experience, that finding the trainer who’s going to best serve your specific needs is one of the most important components involved in your development as a rider. We all have short stories - our short term goals and activities, and long stories, our big picture motivations and aspirations. I would like to explain to you why I am a trainer who is much more focused on your long story.
The primary demand in the horse world seems to revolve around these short stories. The few minutes we spend in the show ring are most of what we focus on and are, inarguably, what gets the most recognition and rewards. We put an enormous amount of emphasis on our score - do we agree with it, how could we do something differently to bring it up - did the judge like us, how did we place, what did we or didn’t we qualify for and so on. It’s not to say that these are bad things, they’re a legitimate and necessary part of competition, but this intense scrutiny of very small periods of performance can give us tunnel vision in regards to what we do the rest of the time. They also aren’t necessarily an accurate indicator of how things are going. You can ride a 5 mover to score a 6.5 or ride a 9 mover down to a 7 - who’s the better rider? But who wins? It’s subjective and certainly not always fair. I have lots of experience tweaking tests and helping people chase medals and scores, but it’s ultimately unsatisfying without a real barometer of horsemanship to compare to. While there are many riders who are absolutely “the real deal” winning in the short term, looking good doesn’t always mean feeling good or riding well, and it’s ultimately the horses that suffer.
The long story is more stable and represents the big picture, holistic view of your horses quality of life with you. Are they living a happy life? Do they enjoy their work? Do they feel good in their bodies? Are they mentally physically and emotionally healthy? Are you building a strong foundation together that will lead to progression to the higher levels? Do these things I just listed all complement each other? These are the questions that matter to me and, in my experience, they can often become obscured when we become over-absorbed in the small picture. I want you and your horse to have a long, rewarding and successful career with training you can count on, while you enjoy and improve each other, whether you decide to show your short story or not. A team with a great long story will probably be able to present a great short story, but if they have a bad day, they know it’s just a moment, use the feedback to adjust if appropriate and continue on their merry way.
I have many clients come to me because they’ve bottomed out in the short story way of training. I, myself, had exactly that experience years ago when I had my own personal riding crisis (I was a popular professional at the time too, btw, making it extra awkward). I really understand and sympathize with how awful this feels. I was blessed to have a somewhat complicated horse that I loved very much and refused to give up on (he was also very spooky and would have been horrible to retire to just hack - haha) and this led me to find the best people who I ever could have dreamed of. Just on the other side of despair was a wonderful new riding life.
When I started working with JJ, I knew that her mentor was Charles DeKunffy. I’d read his books, knew his reputation as a legitimate master and I absolutely loved how JJ rode - I wanted to ride like that. She had recently moved within a couple of hours of me and I started going to ride with her for a few days at a time, hosting clinics, encouraging my students to work with her and taking every chance I got to either take lessons with her or watch her ride or teach. We became friends and she let me unload my guilt and fears, which she graciously reassured me about and little by little, things really started to change for me. I now recognize that a big part of that was my central nervous system calming down, but I was able to relax, be vulnerable and just soak up the information - & what information it was! This was not what I had been taught and it all worked. Maybe I could learn to ride? I was already on cloud 9 when, at the end of that season before she left for Florida, JJ invited me to come ride with Charles. Well, I mean, WOW - so, I did and, for all the wonderful things she had done for me and my riding, Charles probably gave me the biggest upgrade I’d ever experienced over those two days. It was one of the most incredible experiences of my life. And then it kept going on like this for the next few years - lots of time with JJ and continued opportunities to work with Charles - until JJ moved to Tryon. I learned so much. My difficult horse became wonderful (though we never did show together again - I had no real desire because all of my energy was going into retraining myself) and my students and their horses were all blossoming.
It finally made sense, but here’s why - even though we were all wearing sparkly brow bands, this was dressage as it was intended, taught by people with the long story in mind. Sure, JJ competes a lot, but I’ve seen first hand that the work she’s doing at home is even better. That old rule (that nobody seems to follow, unfortunately) that you should be showing two levels below what you school at home? She actually does it. Why? Because the short stories come and go, but her horses long stories are what matter the most to her. Charles is one of the last people alive with a Calvary education - we all know that dressage was developed by the Calvary as a way to train horses to be ridden into war, but have you ever thought about what that actually means? It’s pretty crazy - riding a flight animal into a terrifying, noisy, confusing melee of violence - & once you actually got there, you had to fight from the back of said flight animal. So, the horse needed to be rideable, the rider needed to have a good seat (to say the least) to be able to direct the horse clearly and the horse had to listen to the rider - that communication had to be so unshakable that they could both count on it to stay alive. Their long stories might not even happen if the short story didn’t go well - so, the training HAD to be good, had to be reliable. These weren’t super fancy horses either and remember that the earliest training manual was written sometime around 1350 BC. To put it simply, dressage has been a highly functional way to train average horses to do some pretty extraordinary stuff for thousands of years. The position in which we sit on the horse isn’t some arbitrary way to hold your body to look fancy, it is the most functional arrangement for the purpose of staying on and aiding the horse. Same goes for the frame of the horse and all of the other markers we’re supposed to look for to confirm “correct” training in competition. Piaffe, interestingly, was developed inside the walls of a city under siege to keep the horses fit, btw - but I digress - my point is, none of dressage is meant to be superficial. It was never meant to be pretty and all of it was depended upon for the ultimate life and death stakes of safety and utility. It still fills me with awe when I think that this is even possible. The TRUST these horses and riders shared! In my opinion, this is the heart of dressage - all riding at its best, really - & exactly my point of the long story/big picture. The goal is an unshakable relationship of instant communication, founded in the deepest trust and love.
At first, I was stunned by how different the learning environment was. No yelling, no insults or name calling, no disrespect of any kind, just clarity, patience and consistency. They would happily tell you whatever you needed to know to get better and would continue to explain it to you in a million different ways until you were able to understand it - no temper, no frustration, they knew you would get it eventually - because that’s also how they rode their horses. There is definitely plenty of humor, but never violence, always endless patience. It makes such a big difference.
These are certainly lofty goals that I’m talking about, but they’re attainable and the thing is, to train in this way is actually fairly simple - we have to communicate in ways that horses understand. The universal language of horses is balance. When we adopt a way of riding that clearly conveys our messages within that balance, we can develop a working vocabulary with them that becomes as pleasant as having a conversation with a good friend. Once we start riding this way, the benefits are enormous. We also notice a lot more - especially the gaps in our foundational understanding. This can be frustrating at first, but we need to take the time to strengthen these weaknesses because they’re ultimately going to make the training unable to progress and can even be detrimental to our horse’s long term soundness. All the while, the ability to communicate with your horse is increasing and we eventually become fluent in the language of that relationship. Once that happens, it’s all there - responsiveness, harmony, focus - that trust - it’s a joy to be a part of.
If you’ve made it this far, I’m sure you can tell that I’m passionate about what I do and I consider it my great privilege to pass along what I’ve learned. If this is something that interests you, I am confident that I can help you and I look forward to you getting in touch. I also understand that it’s not what everyone is looking for, I thank you for reading about this small, but pivotal part of my story, wish you all the very best and hope that you find a perfect trainer for your needs.
Happy Riding!
Kris
